This talk covers two powerful but incomplete artificial intelligence projects in Ruby: Archaeopteryx, a Ruby drum machine which can improvise its own rhythms, and Epic Towelie, which can automate several tasks involved in refactoring JavaScript, such as identifying duplication, identifying highly similar code, and extracting repetitive code into wrapper functions. The speaker may perform music; the speaker's code will definitely perform music. The talk will also pose an important and challenging question: do you need a goat to fly to the moon?