Sessions at Transcending Boundaries Conference 2012 on Saturday 27th October

We allies mean so well, but everyone makes mistakes. Come learn from two queer-affirmative therapists about some common faux pas and what you can do to avoid them.

Mixed orientation marriages and relationships where one partner is bisexual and the other heterosexual often contain complex relationship dynamics. This workshop will review the issues and challenges bisexuals face in our relationships with our partners, family, and friends with an emphasis on positive outcomes. Mixed orientation marriages and relationships provide tremendous opportunities for personal happiness and growth when approached with the proper attitudes. This workshop will include an opportunity for participants to share their strategies for success as we can all benefit from the stories and experiences of others. Participants of all sexual orientations will come away with a better understanding of mixed orientation marriages and relationships and the many ways we can make them fabulous relationships.

LGBT and gender non-conforming elders and older adults face numerous barriers to asserting their legal rights. We face additional hurdles when our families of choice begin to age with us. This workshop will address how to navigate some of these legal obstacles and engage in a facilitated discussion on intergenerational support.

That's queer. You're a queer. LGBTQueer. We're here; we're queer. Queer community. We know this term has power both constructive and harmful, and we wish to use it with intention. This discussion will ask participants to consider "What is Queer?" by showcasing the distinct narratives of four queer-identified individuals from The Attic Youth Center in Philadelphia and how they relate to the term. With perspectives ranging from first-generation Caribbean-American to raised in the Baptist church to Butler-loving theorist to raised by two gay dads, we share this term but not necessarily much else. Topics covered in this facilitated discussion will include: schisms of gender, age, race, and class found among queer-identified individuals; whether "umbrella term" is an appropriate label for queer; experiences residing in communities where queer has not been reclaimed; queer as a political, normativity-challenging stance versus a practical behavioral label; if queer fits in LGBTQ; whether or not queer is, can, or should be distinct from a "queer studies"; and various other points of dissent and agreement. Looking forward, we will ask the audience to assist us in querying strategies toward a dynamic queer community that effectively retains an emphasis on person-specific experiences.

From former mayoral candidate and author, Richard Dedor, comes an engaging and interactive session looking at where social media is and where you can take it for your organization. You'll see how you can utilize current technologies like Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr as well as emerging technologies to engage, inform and raise awareness. You'll leave with a better understanding of technologies role in your mission and a plan to execute it

What does it mean for an asexual person and a sexual person to start a relationship? Kristen (pansexual) and Matt (asexual) share some of their experiences and lessons learned, including understanding what (a)sexuality and physical intimacy mean for them; exploring the dynamics of physical, emotional, and romantic connections; and communicating desires and boundaries.

This interactive workshop will provide an overview of suicide among lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning (LGBTQ) youth and the different environmental stressors that contribute to their heightened risk for suicide. After reviewing current research, there will be an emphasis on best practices and practical steps that service providers, educators, and LGBTQ non-profit professionals can take to promote a positive environment for all youth. In addition the workshop will discuss best practices regarding the discussion of suicide, bullying and related topics with a focus on keeping youth safe.

From the man or woman who cross-dresses for the first time as part of a BDSM scene, to the transsexual who is trying to figure out which play parties they can attend, being transgendered in the BDSM scene is both a blessing and a challenge. At the same time, a remarkably high percentage of transgendered people identify with leathersex - why? We'll discuss how BDSM roleplaying lends itself to gender play, struggle with the political implications of being gender transgressive perverts, talk about what happens to D/s roles when people change gender roles, and remind folks of what we have to teach the larger community. For transgendered folks of all stripes, their partners, friends and allies, and anyone who's curious about the intersection of kink, power exchange, and the gender spectrum.

As polyamorous folks, we talk a good game about our relationships with our "metamours": people with whom we have a partner or partners in common. For many of us, a cornerstone of our polyamory is having caring, appreciative, and mutually-supportive metamourships. But poly communities don't talk much about HOW we develop and maintain these relationships. Meanwhile, mainstream culture tells us that our lover's other lover is someone we should dislike and distrust. How do we make the leap from "threat" to "family member"? How do we stay connected to our metamours when relationship troubles hit? Why do metamour relationships even matter? In this hour-long Metamour Intensive, we'll dig deep into the nature of having and being a metamour. Drawing on the challenging work of Franklin Veaux, Maymay, and David Jay, we'll discuss what metamour relationships are and WHY we don't talk about them enough; share concrete strategies for building and facilitating healthy, fulfilling, stable metamour relationships; and untangle how normative cultural programming gets in our way. By the end, you will understand why strong metamour-relating skills are important not just to polyamory but for social justice work as a whole.

My Naked Self is an introductory workshop for anyone interested in exploring their gender identity, sexuality, body/self-image and/or awareness through guided writing exercises, improvisational movement, and encouraged sharing or performance. This workshop is a challenging, inspirational and empowering examination of who others think we are, who we think we are, and the not-so-simple truth: who we are. No theatre or writing experience necessary! (18+ only)

Ignacio Rivera is a Queer, gender fluid, Trans- Entity, Black Boricua performance artist, currently performing skits, spoken word, one-person shows and story-telling internationally. Ignacio is a lecturer/trainer, activist, new filmmaker, sex worker and self-proclaimed sex educator.

As a lecturer/ trainer, Ignacio has spoken at home and abroad on such topics of racism, sexism, homo/transphobia, transgender issues, trans 101, sexual liberation, anti-oppression, anti-violence, multi-issue organizing and more. Ignacio currently consultants with various organizations in New York City conducting professional development trainings for NYC high school staff.

Ignacio is the founder of Poly Patao Productions. P3 is dedicated to producing sex-positive workshops, performance pieces, films, play parties, panel discussions, social/political groups and educational opportunities that are specially geared toward queer women, transgender, multi-gender, gender-queer, gender non-conforming and gender variant people of color.

As a filmmaker Ignacio currently embarked on a film project, "Shades of Kink" a series of educational/documentary style films around inserting a racial/class/sexuality and gender into the Kink world. Ignacio also has completed two experimental shorts. Their first short is an adult short about moving from normality into kink, called “Crossing” and the other is a short about gender called “They” Both films have been shown at various film festivals across the country.

As a sex worker Ignacio is a Pro-dom and is working in the adult film industry. They can be seen in their debut performance in Pink and White Productions, “In Search of The Wild Kingdom” and Morty Diomand’s “Trans Entity: The Nasty Love of Papi and Wil.”

Ignacio is also one of the founding board member of Queers for Economic Justice, a progressive non-profit organization committed to promoting economic justice in a context of sexual and gender liberation.

How do we decide what – if any – label to attach to our complicated and unique sexualities? What labels are out there, and what do they mean? In this interactive and eye-opening program, we’ll be exploring the landscape of identity, the complexity of attraction, and more. And we'll be doing an eye-opening anonymous survey of ourselves and looking at the results! Come find out how we identify, where we fall on the sexuality spectrum, and just monogamous and how kinky we are...

Second City trained improviser and “Miss Trans New England” Lorelei Erisis will share and discuss insights about gender as well as the basics of improv and how it can be used to enrich your own relationships and personal presentation. This is a hands-on workshop that will explore the performative aspects of gender using the techniques and tools of improvisational acting. Participants will have the chance to stretch their legs, open their minds and get up on their own feet to learn some basic games and exercises. No improv or acting experience is necessary, (though experienced performers are welcome too!) just the willingness to try something new and have a little fun. Come ready to play!!!!

Polyamory isn't about how many relationships are active at any moment, and not at all about sex. Rather, it's about knowing that each person has the right to choose whatever sexual/relationship structure works best for that person (in honest communication with all other stakeholders). So polyamory is really about self-determination: the right to live your own life your own way. But so are lots of things. Women's rights, LGBT struggles, issues around race and class, and much more. Thus, "there's no such thing as polyamory." That is, polyamory isn't a separate thing, but rather an example or special case of something much larger: self-determination, living your own life your own way. By reframing polyamory to highlight this classic American ideal, we: tap into a solid positive mindset about all this; avoid the distracting question of sex and who does what with who (because in this framing it has no bearing); and create openings to connect with other movements dealing with self-determination issues in their own communities. All this helps create broader, less charged, and more productive conversations.

The general view of power dynamic relationships‚ meaning relationships where both parties carefully negotiate one person having a certain amount of power and authority over the other‚ is that it is politically incorrect, and probably only done by people with psychological damage. Comparisons are made to the unhealthy power dynamics of "traditional" marriages and nonconsensual slavery. However, many modern practitioners of Dominant/submissive, Master/slave, and Owner/property relationships are politically aware people who are turning the past on its head and creating a whole new form of power dynamic‚ one that has the possibility of making society itself a healthier place for all relationships. Raven and Joshua will discuss how mindful power dynamic relationships can actually be quite radically subversive to the political status quo; and how to build one, how to explain one to your radical friends, and how to understand one if it's not your thing.

This workshop will give an overview of what is meant by trans feminism and why it matters. The opening presentation will cover key ideas in trans feminism, including the history of transphobia within feminism, the problem of trans-misogyny, and historical and contemporary controversies such as women-only space, "radfem" attacks on trans women, and diverse trans-feminine sexualities. We will also contextualize transgender feminism within sex-positive, third-wave feminism, postmodern queer theory, sex worker rights and intersectional theory and activism. Come add you voice to the dialogue and help move feminism to embrace trans, genderqueer and gender nonconforming communities!

Are asexuals queer? What is the place of asexy folks within the wider LGBTQ+ Community? Is combating acephobia a priority within the queer movement? If these questions intrigue you, please come to add your voice to a rousing discussion of asexuality within the queer community! The goal of the workshop is to increase understanding of asexuality, facilitate a safe space for ace folks and our allies, and brainstorm ways to promote ace visibility and education in the queer community. How can we work together to build a queer community that is truly ace-inclusive and affirming? We will also focus on how asexuals contribute to a vibrant queer identity and culture and ways that asexual human rights benefit all of society, pushing us to re-think notions of sexuality, kinship and relationships.

What is bisexuality? What does it mean to identify as bisexual? What are some of the challenges to understanding and representing this often overlooked segment of the LGBT community? Please join us for a lively presentation by award-winning speaker, writer and educator Robyn Ochs. Bring your own list of myths: we’ll analyze them a bit and explore their origins.

The LGBT, genderqueer, kink, polyamorous and other communities traditionally underserved by our health care systems are often particularly - and understandably - wary of seeking emergency care, even when care is badly needed. In this interactive workshop, genderqueer nurse and comic Kelli Dunham walks participants through a visit to the emergency room, presenting information about general ER infrastructure and leads participants in brainstorming and role playing ways in which they can be empowered to facilitate relatively positive endings to various ER scenarios. Also included will be a discussion of picking an ER buddy and developing a written ER plan.

Internal and societal conflicts. How does one reconcile the desire to submit with feminist ideals? How can a relationship based on inequality stand up to modern egalitarian models? How can we, as submissive women, reconcile our desire for submission with our awareness of the hard-won battles and ongoing struggle of feminism? How too, does a male Dominant manage his own conflicts and dominate without guilt? In this talk we plan to discuss how the act of submission can be an expression of choice and an example of "enthusiastic consent" that has been made possible by feminism. The role of D/s in dismantling rape culture will be touched upon, as well as the importance of intentionality and negotiation in developing relationship dynamics. We will discuss what power exchange really means in a relationship and how a submissive holds power within the exchange, how D/s relationships compare to traditional and progressive relationships, and why "different" does not have to mean "unequal" in any relationship.

"Hey you, wanna play?" Sure there are times and places where that might work just fine, but it's not for everywhere or everyone. Maybe you aren't the type to walk up to someone and proposition them that way. Or maybe you are, but you can't quite figure out how to approach your partner(s) about trying out something totally new. Perhaps you're even someone in a long term relationship that's gotten sexually stale who can't find the right way to say "you know, I miss banging you on a regular basis, what can we do about it?" If any of these sound familiar, join us to talk about strategies and communication for dating and scoring. Both in person and on-line situations will be discussed in the class. (18+ only)

Chasers. Surgery. Invasive questions about our bodies. Never finding clothes that fit. Assumptions, assumptions, assumptions. In this facilitated round-table discussion, we'll explore similarities, differences and intersections between ways that fat bodies and trans* & gender non-conforming bodies are policed in our culture -- and we'll look at how these intersections play out in intimate relationships between individuals who are fat and/or trans*. Dakota is a genderqueer trans* person with thin privilege. Rebecca is an inbetweenie fat person with cis privilege. We'll share thoughts and stories from our own relationship journey together and insights from conversations with other fat and trans* friends. We invite everyone with related experiences to join us for a conversation on working together, staying conscious, and supporting and celebrating each others "deviant" bodies and histories.

The nature of our work as intersectional activists is intense and that, combined with passion, can sometimes contribute to depression and burnout as well as a single focus on movement work that is neither healthy for us as individuals nor effective. Yet there is a notable historical precedent for intersectional activism using humor as both a strategy in communication and a tool for personal empowerment. This workshop explores how we can reclaim humor and use it to relieve stress, communicate better, subvert the rigid gender binary and build resilience. You don't have to consider yourself "a funny person" to participate in this workshop. It's about discovering our own unique sense of humor. We'll have fun and NO ONE will make you wear a clown nose, promise.

Courts have historically denied legal rights of bisexual and gender or sexually fluid individuals. However, the legal landscape is changing. This workshop will address various ways to protect bisexual and gender or sexually fluid persons. We will conclude with a facilitated discussion about creative ways to push the courts further (including non-legal options).

Starting up a magazine is difficult enough - imagine starting up a smut magazine with a queer, feminist, anti-racist mission and a focus on illustration and high art! Katie will walk through the various trials and tribulations she encounters creating and running SALACIOUS, and take questions on the process. (18+ only)